Secret Admiration

Life's unexpected twists and turns can often lead to unfamiliar paths, causing us to fundamentally change and lose touch with our true selves. The innocence within can disappear due to past hurt and betrayal, leaving behind a sense of maturity. It's a common struggle—between the persona we project to the world and the authentic self that quietly fades over time. 

Life may feel content, yet deep down, the true essence of ourselves remains hidden. As years pass, it's common to disconnect from our genuine selves and mistakenly associate our evolving self with growth, resulting in the suppression of the older version while acknowledging this newfound self.

Then, suddenly, a new person enters your world, and you find yourself secretly admiring them. In this journey, your true inner self emerges. From a distance, you see yourself and realize that the innocent and free-spirited version is coming back. Ironically, this person has no clue about the role they are playing in your life, yet they unknowingly bring gratitude for the journey that led you back to your authentic self. 

And then, our rational mind intervenes, reminding us about the hard-learned lessons of the past and the shape we have molded into. Your heart urges you to let go of the baggage, acknowledging the scars life has left, yet yearning for a transformation where the real you emerges effortlessly. Listening to the mind, we hit it away like playing Whac-A-Mole with a toy mole. But guess what? It keeps popping up persistently every time.

Your mind helps you realize that the version of yourself, unburdened by guilt, free from wounds and scars, resurfaces frequently, unveiling the essence of your true self. You feel drawn to your pure, soulful persona, reminiscent of an innocent baby.

Now, a tug of war ensues between your heart and mind. In the end, it's up to you to decide which thought holds more value. You can choose to embrace the life lessons that have been taught to you or opt to pick up that innocent, pure soul along with the valuable lessons and move forward.

Realizing now, we often dust off our true selves while moving forward with our tough lessons. Sometimes, we may not have a specific person to awaken it, but this process taps into our own inner resilience. From a distance, you watch as that person stands with folded arms focused on their task, completely unaware of the profound influence they have had on your life. Although we may struggle to express our deep admiration for this person, those around us, including our life partner, notice the positive changes and the newfound spark that accompanies wth every mention of them.

We maintain boundaries while silently cherishing the positive impact this person has had on our life. We are grateful for their influence, knowing they are the catalyst for the positive change in our life, and we express our gratitude silently, with no ulterior motives—just genuine, secret admiration.

As for having someone in my life like that, I’d say yes, there is someone along the way who has influenced me profoundly and sparked positive changes. How about you? Do you have someone in your life who quietly holds this special place—a person whose presence has sparked positive change and deep admiration within you?